Forestry - Analogies are Weak

Walk with me through the forest. There are trees, bushes, grass and empty condom wrappers all around. Try to make the best of it. Wander about and ignore the presence of all humanity. For now, we don't belong to them. Only you exist. Only I exist. When one of the trees in this forest collapses, we will hear it fall harmoniously, as if we had already been expecting it. 
Show yourself to me. There is no hiding in this alternate reality. No point in telling me you are a fungus, because the spores you release clearly show otherwise. The forest we are in seems like it is located high above the entire world. Almost like an island in the sky, unreachable to most. 

"Baby, I am tired."
"And I am a suppository!"
"Say what?"

We can shape the forest. There are traces of history here, but we can ignore them if we want. We SHOULD ignore them. In the Before Time, I was arachnophobic, now I still am, but I want to hold my fears in my hands and rather than mercilessly crush them by urinating all over them with my sulfuric urine (that's right!), set them free and coexist. (I realise that in my previous sentence, it almost seems as if I now take spiders and hold them in my hands so that I can urinate on them and in doing so, also urinate on my hands, but I can assure you, I DO wash my hands afterwards!). 

"We shall make soup of this branch!"

In the gentle forest, you and I, we are alone. There are no hunters, no mindless madmen who will tease us into our graves. Here, we can find an open space and lie down in the dead centre of the place. Curious bees might come to investigate but they will ultimately realise that our nectar is not for them. In gratitude, they may give us some of their honey (after we burn the nest, naturally). 

"We have been walking around for hours! Can't we take a break?"
"No, baby, no! We cannot lie down too long here and let ourselves be masturbated by insidious bugs. There is a time and a place for that, and they are Never and Not Here!"
"Those poor little creatures..."

Did you know that all of this used to be desert? All this soil was just dry sand before I realised I could store a year's worth of saliva in an oil tanker and fertilise this soil instantly. So think of this whenever you use any of these trees as masturbatory aids (no pun intended)....

"Sleep, my baby, sleep tight and I will watch the grass grow for the both of us..."